I have an addictive relationship with pleasant memories of my past.
Recalling pleasant experiences is a habit which developed in me, very early in life. May be it is a trick played by my brain, in its effort to get rid off all the unpleasant and painful memories which have accumulated over time.
Or, it is a habit that I picked up in my childhood. As a child I lived with my grandmother. She was very particular that all her children who were studying or working, at that time, elsewhere should come back to her from wherever they were, for every Christmas. Her children were only happy to come home, when feasible. She would be in the kitchen as early as 5.00 AM and would retire only by 8.00 or 9.00 in the night. She enjoyed cooking. But her greatest joy in life was in giving… in feeding others. A woman of few words by nature, this was her main mode of communication, of expressing her love.
Those days, Christmas was family reunion time. And those who arrived will stay for at least a week, some even more.
While together, these children of her’s used to recall stories of their past. It was their habit! These stories were mostly funny and pleasant to listen to. Mostly about childhood pursuits and adventures in their youth !
These discussions took place in every possible place… at meal time, during their long strolls on the unpaved curved and winding roads with small uphill and downhills, which ran along the side of a river, or when they went for a dip in the river which had cold, crystal-clear water running over and around rock edges and then forming in to wide areas of deep blue.
But the main venue was the kitchen where the daughters helped their mother, and sometimes helped themselves with lavish portions of ground coconut , or solid pieces of cooked beef kept ready to be ground and made in to cutlets, or fried ‘papads’ made for the next meal, or some pickles from those many jars, or whatever they could put their hands on. My grandmother would silently and discreetly listen to her grown up daughters’ chattering, and would smile and at sometimes let out a brief laugh, but mostly saying not a word by herself except for an occasional suggestion that they go and take some rest. She never wanted her daughters to work during their vacation time.
Sudden bursts of laughter and loud teasing words from the kitchen would often attract my attention and I would run in from outside where I would be playing, to find out what was happening. Most of the time it was some happy incident from their childhood or youth, being discussed. Lots and lots of laughter, happiness, merry making, and very rarely a tear or two. I used to build images of their stories in my mind, like in a movie, and I used to enjoy that. I must have picked up the habit of dwelling on past pleasant memories from these people.
Whatever the cause of this habit formation, somehow this has helped me in a very positive way. Bad memories are few in my mind now, and the ones that still remain are slowly fading away.
My grandmother is no more…then there was an uncle, who was the husband of my mother’s elder sister and a medical doctor by profession.
Like my grandmother he too was very particular about these family reunions, he would dress up as Santa Clause, distribute presents, and would say things and laugh out himself in an effort to make us all, happy and lighthearted…I remember that the local people had great respect for this uncle of mine, and I cannot forget the display of sincere love and appreciation on their faces, as they showed their respect towards him. People liked him.
He also left us.
Both, my grandmother and this uncle had something in common. Both were very simple at heart. Their greatest virtue was that, they both made us all feel, needed and wanted…that …that is what the family lost, with the departure of these two, simple and loving souls, from this world.
We the kids of then, our children, and their children, and those remaining of the old generation try to meet during Christmas, now. But the need for it is not very heartfelt or eager anymore…the involvement not so deep…the attendance is very low…these reunions are very brief…we hardly have time enough to talk about the present…then how will the past be even considered a topic.
I know that no body is to be blamed. Life 50 years back was comparatively easier and less complicated than what it is now. Population has already exploded… resources for everyday life are becoming scarce…to survive you need to rush, run, and fight. Above all, we are always short of ‘time’. No body has time enough for themselves, let alone for others. How I wish at times that the duration of a day could, somehow, be extended to more than 24 hours… Or that ‘time’ sealed in packets could be purchased from supermarkets!
Recently I met a few old friends, after about 40 years. We were together in the college. It surprised me, when I noticed that we were mostly discussing about our life 40 years back, in the college and hostel! We were not inquiring each other about our post-college life, present family, or job. We enjoyed dwelling in the past discussing our old friends, teachers, and some funny incidents that had happened in those days. It was really refreshing to walk down memory lane.
Going back in time, I remember that it was in 1967 or 1968, that I saw the film ‘Sound of Music’. I was studying in the 10th standard. This is the first movie that I saw on a 70 mm screen. I still have pleasant memories about this movie.
Sound of Music is based on a true story of the widowed and retired Austrian naval captain von Trapp , his 7 children and Maria who is hired by him to look after the children. This happens during the Nazi occupation of Austria. The story is one of courage, the power of music and love.
The songs from this movie are wonderful. One of my aunties had a phonograph at home and she had a good collection of LP (Long Play) vinyl records. One of them was of the film Sound of Music. I had the good luck of listening to the songs, hundreds of times. I have forgotten the words of many songs, but the music of these songs is still a part of me. This must the case with many people who saw this movie at that time.
‘Sound of Music’ is still popular in many countries as a stage show.
Recently I came across a video. It is a promotion stunt for a Belgian television program(a reality show), where they were looking for someone to play the leading role, in the musical of “The Sound of Music”.
For this publicity stunt, more than 200 dancers performed their version of “Do Re Mi”, in the Central Station of Antwerp, Belgium. This is the main railway station in the Belgian city of Antwerp, which features number 4, on the most beautiful railway stations in the world compiled by Newsweek Magazine (January 2009).
Those 4 fantastic minutes started at 08:00 AM on 23 of march 2009.
Though it is a publicity stunt, that doesn’t seem to bother anyone, they just liked it for what it is. Probably many who saw this performance felt suddenly a bit lonely in the present chaotic and stressful world.
The producers chose the exact right song: one that take us back to our younger days.
I would like to share this video with you. (If you have a slow internet connection, let the video load completely before watching it. To get the feel of it, use a good headphone, and turn the volume way up! )
Needless to say that this video took me back in time.
We’re in a global economic crisis, there’s terrorism from outside and corruption from inside threatening us, global warming and erratic weather changes to be dealt with, AIDS and other deadly diseases to be escaped from, scarcity of food and water, disintegrating community and family values, failing marriages, failing religious and moral values, everything happens just opposite to what we plan and scheme and expect…Definitely much more than one can shoulder…
Go back to the comfort, security and happiness of some pleasant memories of the past, once in a while.
That will let us to forget our worst experiences in the past, and the uncertainties of the present and future.
You will feel refreshed and rejuvenated in mind and spirit.
“To look backward for a while is to refresh the eye, to restore it, and to render it the more fit for its prime function of looking forward.” – Margaret Fairless Barber (7 May 1869 – 24 August 1901)
